Learning to Love Again: Dating After a Difficult Break-Up

breakupDating after a difficult break-up can be hard work. Emotional baggage has a way of weighing you down, and the prospect of dating again may seem like more than your battered heart can bear. If you’re considering reentering the online dating world after a bad split with a previous partner, these simple tips may help.

#1 – Allow Yourself Time to Heal

Many bad relationships have been born of the bad relationships that came before. A rebound is generally short, intense and doomed to fail. Make peace with the death of your prior relationship and allow yourself proper time to grieve. Only when you have fully let go of your previous partner can you be truly open to finding a new love. This process can be accomplished in weeks for some, while it may take months or even years for others. Do not rush from one relationship to the next without properly dealing with your feelings.

#2 – Examine What Went Wrong in Your Previous Relationship

Every relationship, good or bad, teaches you something about yourself. Examining why your previous relationship failed can help prevent you from repeating the mistake. Evaluate what you loved about your former partner as well as the things that you could have done without. Identify characteristics that are important to you as well as those that are potential deal breakers. Knowing yourself will allow you to better convey your needs to future partners.

#3 – Change Your Dating Profile

While using the same profile you’ve used previously may seem to make sense, resist the temptation. The person who made that profile was successfully matched to a relationship that ultimately failed. Create a new profile from scratch. Incorporate new pictures and new interests. Starting over, both literally and symbolically, leaves you open to new options and greater adventures.

#4 – Don’t Settle

When you’ve been with someone for a long while, being alone seems incredibly dull. After a bad break-up, people often settle for anyone who will eliminate that lonely feeling. It is important to be sure you are interested in a potential match for who they are rather than for the company they can provide.

#5 – Take Things Slow

Jumping into a new relationship feet first may not be the best idea. Taking things slowly allows you to get to know your new partner in a controlled environment. Remember, you have a lifetime to love this person. Savor the feeling.

Learning to love again after a difficult break-up is possible with a little self-reflection, a bit of change and a lot of patience. Being sure you have made peace with your previous relationship can help ensure the success of a new online relationship.



Online Dating: Does it Work?

According to a survey performed by a popular dating website in 2010, one in five relationships now begins online. That’s a pretty powerful statistic and one that has plenty of people asking questions. Does online dating really work? Can true, everlasting love really be found online? Is online dating worth the time and financial expenditure necessary to succeed?

The answers? Yes, yes and yes!

Online dating is not for the easily deterred. While plenty of people find their happily ever after on the computer screen, it may take many failed connections to find the one that matters. Finding your perfect match online requires patience, determination and a thick skin.

For those who can stick it out through the tough times, online dating is wildly successful. Several popular sites match users with potential suitors based on their answers to a series of questions. These sites have the best success rates. Knowing a person has the values and morals you want before ever seeing their profile is a comfort to many people. These sites do most of the work for you.

Other dating websites take a more hands-off approach. These sites allow users to search by picture, location, age or other defined criteria. Usually cheaper to join than their scientifically based cousins, it is possible to find love here as well, although you may have to weed through quite a few crazy people before you find a date.

Online dating websites play an important role in today’s busy world. They allow 24/7 access to a variety of different people who are all looking for some form of relationship. It is no longer necessary to spend hours each weekend at the bar in the hopes your soul mate will walk through the door and declare his everlasting affection. With a click of the mouse and some basic personal information, thousands of potential soul mates are at your disposal. With those kind of odds, how could it fail?

Online dating definitely works. A University of Bath study performed in 2009 shows that 94% of people who have one date after meeting online go on to have a second date, and the average relationship length resulting from online encounters was at least seven months. Customer testimonials posted on all major dating websites seem to indicate that many online relationships culminate in marriage.

The success of online dating is unquestionable. It may take some persistence and a lot of resolve, but those who go online looking for love have an amazing chance of finding it there.

What Women Want

Men believe that women are some great mystery. The truth is, a woman is more like a man than he knows. Slightly afraid of commitment, easily swayed by a pretty face and as ready for adventure as her male counterparts, in the end, women just want to love and be loved. Read on to discover the things a woman really wants in her man.

A woman craves an emotional connection. She needs to feel that her partner truly understands her. While physical intimacy is important to any relationship, emotional intimacy is paramount in a woman’s mind. She needs to feel she is being heard without being judged. She needs to know that you truly understand her. A relationship without intimacy is doomed to failure. Yes. It’s that important.

The modern woman has come a long way from the barefoot-and-pregnant days of yesteryear. Today’s woman successfully juggles family, career and a social life, and she’d like just a tiny bit of respect for it, thank you very much. Ask her how her day was and really listen to her response. Show her how much you appreciate her. Allow her the freedom to make her own decisions and the respect that comes with knowing she will make the right choice. Understand what she deals with on a daily basis and do your best to help her out. Your efforts will not go unrewarded.

Loyalty is important to a woman. She needs to know that you will remain faithful, sexually or otherwise. While men fear their woman will stray in a physical way, a woman would be much more hurt by her man having an emotional affair. Although she may have a propensity to become jealous, showing her that she’s the only one in your life can alleviate suspicion and create a better relationship for both of you. Be loyal to her in words and in action. Stand up for her in times of crisis. A woman with a loyal man will return his faithfulness tenfold.

A woman looks for core characteristics in a potential partner. She wants an emotional connection, basic respect and unerring loyalty. Earning the key to a woman’s heart is not at all difficult once you have learned how to give her the love, respect and fidelity that she desires.